Sunday, September 5, 2010

The Nebbishy Jewish Gardener: Part 1


I feel that it is time to start a new series on Rubin on Wry: The Nebbishy Jewish Gardener. This will attempt to chronicle my most unlikely foray into the world of windowsill herb and flower gardening. It comes from the perspective of a bookish but curious man who was completely oblivious to the exciting world of "keeping something alive."

More often in my past, the results were less than spectacular - see leaning / dying Basil on right, and view him in his former glory here.

I was surrounded by experts gardeners growing up, but since they weren't two-dimensionally entrapped inside a book I didn't pay them any attention. My mother and aunt are accomplished gardeners - they regular grow foot-long cucumbers as thick as your arm, not to mention tomatoes, zucchinis, peppers and lots more.

But I didn't learn anything from them. Instead, I started off this journey alone, ignorant, and with the simplest possible device - a 99 cent basil planter I found in the discount aisle at Target, situated between bags of animal crackers and My Little Pony stickers. From seeds I grew them into, eventually, the lifeless thing above. But it soared majestically for many months, yielding pizza-ready basil on more than one occasion.

So if you like reading a buffoons journey into a somewhat non-masculine field, read on. If you enjoy gripping tales of triumph and bitter defeat, definitely read on. And if you enjoy learning a thing or two about gardening, well... you get the idea :)

3 comments:

Ira said...

if it makes you feel any better, i have killed two basil plants and a cactus (yes, cactus -- i overwatered it).

shesthesheriff said...

Ehh....I don't know about this series man. Gardening is very boring to read about.

Why not take a fencing class-you never hear about great Jewish sword fighters.

I even have a character all set up for you. You're 'Ramblin Rubin', a lanky but chiseled *English* ninja. You're the worlds best swashbuckler, and a Casanova, but you're also a hopeless wino, WHO mourns the wasted years in which he was forced to labor in his family garden as a child and who now HATES GARDENING AND VOWS TO TAKE HIS REVENGE ON ALL OF PLANTKIND!!

Should we be writing this down?

Jonathan Rubin said...

Dr. Sheriff,
Thank you for your suggestion. I will be responding to it in full in my next post.

Sincerely,
Your Mother