Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Turtle Safety: No one takes it seriously

We all like to pretend we live safe lives, but most of the time I think we're fooling ourselves.

We choose convenience over safety all the time. We drive in cars on the freeway, in which we're more likely to die than nearly any over activity.

Or food poisoning, such as eating undercooked eggs, tainted beef or raw fish. We use cell phones even though not nearly enough research has been done on whether they are safe or not and even though they tell you in your cell phone manual (including whatever phone YOU have right now) that the proper way to talk on the phone is holding it two inches from your head. Ever seen anyone do that who wasn't on reality TV? And I never wore a bicycle helmet a day in my life, even after I flipped over the handlebars on the Boulevard once.

We try and take safety seriously, but we can't. And sometimes, safety is just plain ridiculous. Like this - a publication my office puts out about how pet turtles are a common source of salmonella poisoning in children.

Sounds serious, right?

Yes, it is. But man - talk about calling the fun police! Imagine telling your kid he can't have Donatello because that adorable like turtle could make him sick. That dumb little amphibian could make your boy seriously ill. But, hey - he's crying, so I'll buy it for him.


Anonymous said...

" I want to put stickers on turtles" - Carolyn via Demetri Martin

shesthesheriff said...

I was thinking about this this morning, its funny that you wrote this.

There should be a warning when you buy a manticore, because a lot of people probably go into it thinking they're actually buying a manicure.